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offspeed4

169 Posts

Posted - 04/22/2014 :  21:15:18  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Would you rather be on a very good major team playing about 50-60% of the innings in the field and being a sub about 1/2 the time on Sunday or play on a AAA team and play 90% of the time and rarely get out of the line up? Assume the kid likes his major team and wants to stay. I would like to hear opinions and perspectives.

excoach12

159 Posts

Posted - 04/22/2014 :  22:04:17  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
You don't get better on the bench at 10U-12U.
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/22/2014 :  22:05:19  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
If my kid wanted to stay on the team, I'd stay.
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LittleDawg

91 Posts

Posted - 04/22/2014 :  22:06:37  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
It's great he wants to be on a winning team but there is no substitute for playing time. I'd rather have my son playing as much as possible to get the game experience and it would be the same from 10U-13U at least and maybe even 14U. There is so much to learn via playing vs. sitting and watching. Once they hit high-school, they can specialize
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ATLDodgers

21 Posts

Posted - 04/23/2014 :  01:29:12  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
You dont get any better watching really good kids do all the playing. If that were true, save your travel ball fees and buy season tickets to the atlanta braves and see how much better your kid gets. This is a game of muscle memory. The more reps a player gets, the better he will become. The only thing you get better at sitting is sitting(and maybe keeping the book).

Put your kid on a team where they can play, learn and contribute. The only way a kid should sit is if he is playing up and maybe its his second team. There are enough teams in georgia to where players can get the reps and game experience they need.
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T13

257 Posts

Posted - 04/23/2014 :  06:46:00  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Playing is all that matters.....sitting on a bench will not make you better even if the team wins every game. Everyone's last game is coming much sooner then they think.
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Critical Mass

277 Posts

Posted - 04/23/2014 :  08:24:40  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
When my son was 10-12, we chose to play with a AAA team and not with the major for that reason. Things have worked out. We have to think about his goals..if he really wants to participate and play over being on a team with his buddies? We hopped around a bit within travel ball from 8-15 and probably had a label on us but my son is about to graduate in 2015 and go to a D1 school to pitch. i believe he is prepared to join that team and succeed because he never got too comfortable and was always competing vs different kids.
I'll use the "at the end of the day" phrase and say form my experience with my son, he doesnt really remember all of those seasons/games like we do....he remembers the fun or wins/losses that we important to him/his team at that time or when they went fishing together afterwards. We like to think that the saturday in july vs the arch rival team from east cobb (or insert your rival here) shaped him and exclusively prepared him for HS or college ball, maybe it did/does for your kid, but mine was a young boy who wanted to have fun and play baseball. He asked me the other day, "Dad...how did i get here?" and i had to remind him of everything he has sacrificed. He missed a ton and is blessed to be going D1 on scholarship and i reminded him of all those awesome beach/disney/family friends trips he missed with non travel ball kids/friends across those 8 summers/falls since he was 8u. Enjoy the time with your son and know this, it flies by and i would trade anything to go back and relive that time with him. Just my .02
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atl65

37 Posts

Posted - 04/23/2014 :  08:48:29  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Critical Mass / I could not agree more
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/23/2014 :  09:33:23  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I get what all of you are saying but my stance is different. Sometimes the 11th hitter on a major team becomes the 3-hole guy on that same team after the proverbial light comes on or maybe just puberty changes the game. Some kids just don't eat and sleep baseball and that's okay.

@CriticalMass - That's awesome and you should be very proud but for every story like yours there are twenty more with dads trying to make their kids something that they aren't. Obviously, your son has D1 tools that were developed but some kids don't have those tools.

I played football and baseball in college and I guess I am just not obsessed with him having to follow in my footsteps. So for me, the goal is to keep him interested through development and FUN and if he wants to take it to a higher level, great! If not, great! Does my kid have the tools to play D1 ball? Yes. But it will be up to him not me. I guess that I have seen too many dads with unrealistic expectations over the years and I am determined not to be that guy!

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allbrite

59 Posts

Posted - 04/24/2014 :  12:39:02  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Huler, is your son in the 10-12 range? If so can you explain the tools you say your son has that make him D1 material. I'm curious to see what you say so I can compare.

In my career this is WAY to young to know. Usually by 15 is when you can get a good gauge on potential.
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/24/2014 :  13:40:34  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Allbrite - I should have said maybe or I think so instead of yes. Is that fair?

Edited by - hshuler on 04/24/2014 14:44:21
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Domingo Ayala

56 Posts

Posted - 04/24/2014 :  14:36:14  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
AWESOME Post! My son is at this topic age group and it really just hit home when you stated: "Enjoy the time with your son and know this, it flies by and i would trade anything to go back and relive that time with him."

My 2 cents or 26 peso: I hope that my son would prefer to play AAA over the major team and sit.

quote:
Originally posted by Critical Mass

When my son was 10-12, we chose to play with a AAA team and not with the major for that reason. Things have worked out. We have to think about his goals..if he really wants to participate and play over being on a team with his buddies? We hopped around a bit within travel ball from 8-15 and probably had a label on us but my son is about to graduate in 2015 and go to a D1 school to pitch. i believe he is prepared to join that team and succeed because he never got too comfortable and was always competing vs different kids.
I'll use the "at the end of the day" phrase and say form my experience with my son, he doesnt really remember all of those seasons/games like we do....he remembers the fun or wins/losses that we important to him/his team at that time or when they went fishing together afterwards. We like to think that the saturday in july vs the arch rival team from east cobb (or insert your rival here) shaped him and exclusively prepared him for HS or college ball, maybe it did/does for your kid, but mine was a young boy who wanted to have fun and play baseball. He asked me the other day, "Dad...how did i get here?" and i had to remind him of everything he has sacrificed. He missed a ton and is blessed to be going D1 on scholarship and i reminded him of all those awesome beach/disney/family friends trips he missed with non travel ball kids/friends across those 8 summers/falls since he was 8u. Enjoy the time with your son and know this, it flies by and i would trade anything to go back and relive that time with him. Just my .02


Edited by - Domingo Ayala on 04/24/2014 14:44:21
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bballman

1432 Posts

Posted - 04/24/2014 :  15:58:07  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Last night was senior night at my son's college game. There was only one senior on the team this year. They did a little ceremony before the game to recognize him. I looked back to give his parents a thumbs up and saw his mother desperately trying to hold back the tears. This will be her son's last year playing baseball. It makes you appreciate the time spent together and makes me want to cherish every minute. My son's sophomore year of college is almost complete and it still seems like yesterday that I was so excited about him starting his freshman year of HS. I can remember everything that happened. I cannot believe that I am so close to seeing the possible end of my son's playing days. And he is 20 and still playing in college. It still goes by SO quickly.

With that being said. Let your son play where he wants to play. Is play time important? Yes it is. But, is your son's enjoyment of the game more important? Yes. If he wants to play on the major team with his friends because it is fun, let him do that. If he wants to play on a different team so he can play more, let him do that. You may want to go over the benefits and consequences of each decision, but in the end, it has to do with him having a good time. If the kids don't enjoy playing, they won't be around that much longer.

Don't get me wrong. I agree with what everyone here has said. It's important to get reps, it's important to play over sitting on the bench. But, it's more important that your player have fun doing what they are doing. Could be your player really likes his teammates/friends and that's where he'll be most happy. At this age, let him. Better that than making him change teams when he doesn't want to. Maybe he likes being with his friends, but is getting frustrated with lack of play time. Guide him in the direction of changing teams. But whatever you do, let him have fun and cherish your time together. Believe me, the time does go by much faster than you can ever imagine.
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/24/2014 :  16:52:23  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Bballman - Great post! You said what I was trying to say but much more eloquently. :-)
We were asked to assume that he likes his team and wants to stay. When I made that assumption, playing time is not as important as his hanging with his buddies.

My son has always liked baseball and loved football and honestly, I just want him to enjoy both sports. Sports should be fun and people forget that sometimes. I see kids who are not allowed to really have fun because their parents don't let them. I decided a while back that sports would never come between my son and me.

I ask him every year if he wants to play and he always say "yes, why do you keep asking me that?" My reply is always because I don't want you to think that you have to play a sports because I did or that I will be upset if you said that you don't want to play.

Edited by - hshuler on 04/24/2014 19:29:56
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HardBaller

101 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  00:12:40  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Great question and I think it points out the LUXURY we have as Americans to have OPTIONS: Play or don't play, it up to you. Just have fun, enjoy yourself, have fun with your friends all at a TB price tag!

But the great players of the past and other players around the world play out of necessity, as a way out, because the options of not playing means being relegated to an existence in poverty.

You guys know the results, the insane ratios of kids from the Caribbean and other places making it. I guess I'm just saying being the best you can be is not forged out of a "play or don't play", have fun, life is a bowl of cherries, pick the one you want mentality; at least not for most.

You guys heard of the failure to launch syndrome? It's forged out of the irresponsibility of American luxury! Work or don't work, move out or don't move out...sounds a lot like play or don't play. I don't like it.

For me, I'm obsessed with my son knowing that this life is not all about having fun, playing with your buddies, just have a good time. Nope, I'm concerned that there is no doubt in his mind that he knows in this life, you only get so many talents and you can't bury them; you can't. Conversely, you have to maximize your talent, you have to soar!

Nope, if we need to have fun, we'll have to do that in the rec league and soar with our other talent doing something else, but as long we're playing TB, got give it everything we got, in the game, on the field, every inning.

He's still begging to play every year...I'm proud of him.

Edited by - HardBaller on 04/25/2014 08:45:25
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  09:41:23  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Hardballer - Great points but many of the players in the major leagues right now weren't playing out of necessity but simply for the love of the game, but make no mistake about it they all worked their tails off to get to The Show.

I try to teach the kids that I coach, including my son the value of hardwork, maximizing their talents, commitment, teamwork, responsibility etc. I honestly don't think many teams work as hard as we do, but we also have lots of fun. You can do both! I tell my parents to keep things in perspective all the time because whether we want to admit it or not, SOME kids feel like their parents' love is conditional, based on how they perform on a given day.

I have the privilege of chatting with a coach of a perrenial top five/top ten D1 team on occasion and most of his advice is about making sure that kids are enjoying the game, managing parents' expectations, having kids play other sports etc.

My son is a middle of the pack player on an Elite Major team and I NEVER ask him to go hit or throw a bullpen anymore. No doubt, he can be a better player if he worked harder...but I can't/won't want it for him. I leave how good he wants to be up to him. Funny thing happened this year, now he's starting to ask and says that he thinks that he's starting to like baseball more than football. My response, whatever you decide I will be there to support you.




Edited by - hshuler on 04/25/2014 09:50:48
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Coachof3

97 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  11:07:40  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
@hshuler - You NAILED IT! At some point after 12, they have to want it for themselves and all we can do is encourage and enjoy the ride.

Great points!

quote:
Originally posted by hshuler


I NEVER ask him to go hit or throw a bullpen anymore. No doubt, he can be a better player if he worked harder...but I can't/won't want it for him. I leave how good he wants to be up to him. Funny thing happened this year, now he's starting to ask and says that he thinks that he's starting to like baseball more than football. My response, whatever you decide I will be there to support you.





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bama21

278 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  12:30:27  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
I would imagine that most, if not all, successful people were pushed at some point. Unfortunately, not all kids are the same and some need more ENCOURAGEMENT than others. If you have to push your kids to do their homework, chores, ect, then why shouldn't you push them in other areas as well. Your child doesn't know what's best for them and they rely on us(parents), even though they don't know it, to make those decisions. I would rather my son fail because he wasn't good enough, rather than fail because he didn't give it his all and one day they will be old enough to know the difference, you just hope that it isn't too late.
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willbgood

25 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  13:22:48  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
@Hardballer Great response...
We(American) have gotten to soft on preparing our children on some important life lessons...especially with our young men.
Coaches and Parents say all the time we are training young men not only to be players but also preparing them to be men. But many parents 'CHANGE their tune' when the requirements and the responsibilities of that sports starts to demand more and/or the challenges of the game become more difficult.
IF you have your son playing a competitive sport, especially any $$ sports league (Travelball, AAU, etc..) your son should have a desire to compete and to play at a high level.(period)
If this is not happening or they "just want to hang with their friends"...you, or we, as parents should encourage the child to find another interest that drives them to excel, and where they can continue to develop their talents. Forget about using competitive leagues as some form of a "Play Date"!! Have that at your house with as many of his friends you allow him to have over and leave the competitive sports league to the kids who have a desire/passion to get better, no matter the classification (Major,AAA, AA,..) each classification have kids who want to get better and if the # of kids on the team who "just want to hang out with friends" out weigh the # of kids who want to get better and excel, then that team should be in a rec league NOT TRAVEL BALL.
The reality of this topic is all players on top performing (or any) team in a competitive league should work hard for playing time...every player! Iron sharpens Iron...the harder the bench players work to get playing time the harder the starters better work and if they don't the subs will be the new STARTER!
Yes 'Fun' is FUNdamental at this age however Knowing that you have to work hard to perform at your best or the next guy may take your spot is an ESSENTIAL lesson of Life!

Edited by - willbgood on 04/25/2014 14:58:47
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rippit

667 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  13:37:48  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Amen to you Bama!
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  14:22:31  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Bama - Point taken but I am not PUSHING him when it comes to sports...and please don't think that because I choose not push him that I think someone who does is wrong. Now, I will say that respectable behavior, schoolwork and chores are non-negotiable and sports are optional in my home. If those things (meaning school, behavior and chores) aren't handled properly...sports will be taken away. It has happened before and will happen again, if necessary.

Also, you can't make a kid give his all. That's an internal decision. There are kids who run hard whether the coach is looking or not...and there are kids like me who coasted as soon as the coach turned his back. :-) The elite athletes (MJ, Peyton Manning, Derek Jeter) are not only the ones who ran hard but they also make sure that their teammates run hard too. Here's a personal example, high school coach tried to make me a catcher. I utterly hated catching but took one for the team and did it anyway. I was NEVER interested in catching lessons and wanting to getting better at it. I loved baseball but hated catching. No one in the world could have motivated me to want to do that. Not my dad, not my coach!

Edited by - hshuler on 04/25/2014 14:59:32
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bballman

1432 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  17:56:55  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Who says a kid can't have fun and play with his friends AND work hard to get better. The two are not mutually exclusive.
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hshuler

1074 Posts

Posted - 04/25/2014 :  19:27:38  Show Profile  Reply with Quote
Alas Bballman - Bingo!
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